#4 BEST LAID PLANS

One of my best friends has PLS. It is a not too distant cousin of ALS.  It develops much more slowly and will not kill you quickly the way ALS does but it can be equally disabling and in some ways more tragic.

Jan lived with me for approximately 3 years and although we were both alphas for the most part we got along.

She had to have some minor surgery about a year and a half ago and due to a reaction to the anesthesia she became less able to function in my home.  It was one of the hardest things I ever had to do :  to ask my friend to leave my home.  But that is not what this piece about.

Jan's brother was a very talented amateur carpenter.  He and his brother in law made boxes and jars and dishes and vases of wood pieces.  They were beautiful, inlaid masterpieces.  He also made bird houses.  Jan was interested in "birding" so her brother made her a wonderful birdhouse.  It was modeled loosely after my house and painted in the same colors.  We both loved it.  I bought Jan a pair of binoculars for her birthday and so she watched the birds. (and the neighbors, occasionally).

Because she could not maneuver very well outside.  I filled the feeder, cleaned it up and picked up the seed at the store.  We did not keep lists of the birds we saw but there were cardinals and blue jays, robins and oriels, sparrows and woodpeckers who all came to feed at the beautiful birdhouse.  There were trees surrounding my 1/2 acre and the birds happily made their nests in my gutters, outside lighting and front and back porch, and of course in my grill -- not the trees.  What was really inconvenient though was that the deer found the feeder irresistible as well.  At least twice a week I would go out to find the bird feeder empty and the whole thing tilted askew.  This was a great idea going nowhere fast.  Not only did the deer find the bird seed flavorful but once the feeder was empty they felt compelled to repay my kindness by ridding my garden of all those pesky buds and bulbs that were getting ready to bloom.

Jan also loved flowers and our plan was that I would plant bushes, bulbs, whatever and she would weed as she could sit and work on small patches at a time.  That did not work out as we had hoped either.  She tried valiantly the first summer but the heat and the work became too much for her quickly and by the following spring, after a fall planting of hundreds of bulbs, she could not help in the garden.

As a fledgling birder and gardener I was floundering quickly.  The cats would chase the birds.  The birds would build nests in and on my house because the tenacious cats could climb trees with some acuity. The dog was going berserk as the unimpressed deer meandered eating and destroying the birdhouse and my garden plants as well.  There were sunflowers coming up where I had not planted them.  There bulb holes where flowers were supposed to be and a skunk moved in under my front porch.  Yeah!!!!!!!

I guess the moral of this rant is that challenging nature is not for the feint hearted.  Jan had had PLS for several years when she moved in with me.  The progression had been so slow that it was hardly noticeable.  We figured we had a good ten years. That was not the case.  Strike one!

The birdhouse was a lovely idea that became a uphill battle.  I filled it less and less often, to no avail.  The deer were content  and actually preferred my fresh greens.  Hostas are not only pretty, but they must be delicious.  Strike two!

Tulips and all the other bulbs look beautiful for a week or two but in order for them to thrive and multiply you have to let the green leaves die their slow and messy death before you remove the waste that is left -- it gives the skunks plenty of time to find those bulbs and dig them up.  Strike three!

The game was not over and I learned so many things about gardening from Jan's advice and experience.   We enjoyed what did come up and laughed and puzzled over what did not. I revised planting strategies and found that zinnias were bountiful and cheaper, and seem to have no natural predators. Some plants thrived, some did not.  I grew as a person and unfortunately Jan's health declined more quickly than we expected.  

Jan lives in an assisted living community now.  They have many more accommodations than I could have ever provided for her.  It was sad to see her go and I know in her heart she felt that she would rally and be able to come back.  That has not been the case and I guess I am wickedly relieved. Nothing is as easy as you think it is going to be.

When Jan moved. Her daughters and family came and moved most of her stuff out.  She got rid of some things and sold others and downsized to the apartment that she has now.  Her daughter took the bird feeder back to Boston with her.  My yard is filled with zinnias.

Nature always wins